420calum:

So at work yesterday we only had pink spoons to hand out for the frozen yogurt and every male asked if we had a different color spoon because they did not like pink and it’s femininity and lemme tell u that this proves boys are weak and a fuckjng pink spoon proved that

(via knightscrest)

blxckbiird:

spaghetti-western-wannabe:

blxckbiird:

spaghetti-western-wannabe:

blxckbiird:

spaghetti-western-wannabe:

blxckbiird:

spaghetti-western-wannabe:

So I can either bake these cookies at 400 degrees for 10 minutes or 4,000 degrees for 1 minute.

nick nO THAT’S NOT HOW YOU BAKE COOKIES FRIEND

FLOOR IT?

NICK NO

HOW ABOUT 4,000,000 DEGREES FOR 1 SECOND

NICK YOU ARE GOING TO BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN

I’M GOING TO HARNESS THE FUCKING SUN TO MAKE COOKIES

NICK P L E A S E

(via nipple-whisperer)

deucebag:

theresavoidinmypolaroid:

If it actually started raining men I think I’d just start crying and be really terrified and not leave my house and just curl up into a ball and pretend I couldn’t hear the slamming of bodies falling upon my roof under no circumstances would I think “hallelujah” 

it’s a cold and it’s a broken hallelujah

(via memewhore)

jinxley:

bambigraham:

jinxley:

my little sister officially turned 10 yesterday and because i’m in another state i couldn’t see her so i called instead to sing happy birthday and when i was done she whispered “gay” and hung up on me

is that the same sister who put her burned hand on your heart because ‘it was so nice and cold’

that would be the sister

(via memewhore)